【知らなきゃ損】なぜ彼女が出来ないのか?10個の原因を解説

菊池
こんにちは、菊池です。

あなたには、彼女にしたいと思える女性はいますか?

もしいるなら、是非彼女にしたいですよね!

彼女にするために、様々なアプローチをするかと思います。

しかし、彼女を作れないというケースも多くあります。

菊池
実際私もいろんな女性と出会ってきましたが、彼女にできなかった素敵な女性は多くいます。

そこで今回は、なぜ彼女ができないのか、その原因を徹底的に解説していきます!

一体自分のどこが悪いのか、なんで彼女ができないのか一緒に原因を見ていきましょう!

もしかしたらあなたも気づいていなかったあなたの悪いところがあるからかもしれません。

 

彼女が出来ない10の原因とは一体…

なぜ彼女ができないのか自分でも不思議で仕方がないのではないでしょうか。

その原因を解説していきます。

当てはまるものがないか、チェックしてみてください!

もし当てはまるものがあれば、改善していきましょう!

 

不潔

彼女が出来ない原因第1位と言っても過言ではない原因ですね。

女性からすると不潔な男性って絶対に彼氏にしたくないです。

不潔にも色んな種類があるので、ご紹介していきます。

当てはまるものがないかチェックしてみてください!

 

髪の毛が不潔

髪の毛がベタベタしていたり、フケがついていないか、など髪の毛の状態はどうでしょうか?

自分自身気が付いていなくても、女性から見るとそういうところにはすぐ目が行ってしまいますから、常に気にしましょう。

もし髪の毛のべたつきや、フケがあるなら、しっかり髪の毛のケアをしてあげましょう!

【メンズ美容】男の髪のフケは絶対NG!清潔な髪になろう

2019.02.26

 

洋服が不潔

ヨレヨレの服を毎日着ていたり、毛玉が付いてる服を着たりしていませんか?

また、毎日同じ服を着まわしていませんか?

こういった服装で女性と出会っているのはNGです。

服がダサい以前に汚い印象を抱かれたら彼氏候補からは間違いなく外れます。

ファッションセンスを磨くのも大切ですが、まずは服装の清潔感を保ちましょう!

 

体臭がする

毎日同じ服を着ていたりすると、体臭が出てきます。

自分の臭いに気付く人はなかなかいないのですが、女性からすると体臭がある男性と付き合いたいとは思いませんから、心当たりある方は気を付けましょう。

もし、不安であれば香水などをつけたり、汗拭きペーパーなどを活用して極力匂いを抑える工夫をしましょう。

【メンズ美容】男の体臭の原因と5つの改善策を徹底解説

2019.02.25

 

口臭がする

女性と話した時の口の状態はどうですか?

口臭も体臭と同じくらい女性から嫌がられます。

こちらも体臭と同じで、自分で自分の臭いはなかなか気が付きにくいのです。

特に女性と話すことに緊張しやすい方は要注意なのですが、緊張したときって口の中がどうしても乾燥してしまいます。

そうなると、乾燥することによって口が臭くなりやすいんですよ。

もしかしたら女性と話しているときに口臭が原因で女性に嫌がられているかもしれません。

女性と話す前はうがいをしたり、水分補給をして話すとだいぶ違うと思います。

また、ブレスケアなどの口臭対策をするのもオススメです。

 

爪の手入れが出来ていない

爪が伸びっぱなしや爪の間にゴミが挟まっているといったことはありませんか?

女性は男性の爪をよく見ています。

もし爪が長かったり、爪の間にゴミが挟まっていたら一瞬で引いてしまいます。

爪が長い人は彼氏候補にならないという人がいるくらい、女性の中では男性の爪問題は深刻なものです。

爪が長いと細菌が入りやすいですし、女っぽいという印象を抱いている人もいます。

爪が長い=気持ち悪いと思う女性もいるのが現状なので、一度自分の爪を確認してみましょう。

もし長いのならしっかり爪を切ることをお勧めします。

その他には、爪を噛んだりするのもかなり不潔なのでやめましょう。

爪を適度な長さに切るのが無難ですね!

 

お手洗い後に手を洗わない

トイレに行った後に手を洗わないという男性は多いのではないでしょうか。

これも、不潔な原因に入っています。

「手を洗っているか洗っていないかなんて女性にわかるわけないんじゃないか」

と思う男性もいるかもしれません。

実は、手を洗っているのか洗っていないのかは結構わかりやすいんです。

例えば

お手洗いの後に手を洗った男性は、ハンドソープの香りがしますが、手を洗っていない男性は何も匂いがしませんよね。

また、男性はハンカチをもって歩く人はほとんどいませんよね。

手を洗ったとしたら手が濡れているはずなんです。

機械で乾かす人もいますが、完全に水滴が取れるまで念入りにする人はいないと思うんですよね。

ということは、少しでも手に水滴がついているはずなんです。

でも手が全く濡れていないということは手を洗ってないということに思えてしまいます。

結構そういう細かいところも女性は見ているので、手を洗わない人は不潔に思われてしまうので、気を付けましょう!

 

ネガティブ

ネガティブな男性は彼女ができない男性の特徴ですね。

菊池
実際私も約20年間ネガティブな人間性でした。

ネガティブの加減にもよりますが、あまりにもネガティブな感情が強いと女性は疲れてしまいます。

菊池
「僕なんてダメ人間だ…」

と女性に言ったとします。

それに対して女性は

神楽
「そんなことないよ!大丈夫だよ!」

と最初は言ってくれるでしょう。

しかし、次の日もそのまた次の日も、会うたびに毎回同じことを言われ続けていたら、もう女性はうんざりしてしまいますよね。

最初の一回くらいは問題ないのですが、何度も続けるというのが本当に残念なポイントです。

ネガティブな人と一緒にいると、女性までネガティブになってしまうのです。

本当は明るい女性だったのに、その男性といることによってネガティブに引きずり込まれていくのです。

ネガティブな男性は女性から嫌われてしまう可能性が高いので、彼氏候補になるのはかなり厳しいです。

女性は一緒にいてポジティブになれるような明るく楽しい彼氏が欲しいんですよね。

ネガティブ男性はかなり印象が悪いので、心当たりがあればそれが原因かもしれません。

ネガティブは、自分に自信がないということにも捉えることができますよね。

自分に自信がないということは、自分からアクションを起こすこともできないし、付き合ったとしても彼女を守れる自信もないでしょう。

自分に自信がないのは男らしくないし、頼れないし、女性にとってマイナスなことしかないのです。

ネガティブなのは、自分の人生に悪い影響を与えるだけなので、是非ポジティブな思考を身に付けましょう!

菊池
私も約20年近くネガティブな思考でしたが、変わることが出来たので、誰でも克服できると思います。

私が、どのようにネガティブな性格を克服したか解説した記事があるので、興味がある方はこちらを読んでみてくださいね!

顔や体のコンプレックスを克服して、素敵な恋愛を実現しましょう!

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誰にでも優しい

誰にでも優しい男性は、女性からすると

神楽
「よくわからない男性だな」

という印象に繋がってしまいます。

誰にでも優しいというのはとてもいいことです。

とてもいいことですが、彼女ができやすいかできにくいかと言えば、断然できにくいでしょう。

もし特定の女性にだけ優しくしてあげていたのなら、女性は

神楽
「この男性は私のことが好きなのかも」

と判断がしやすいので、貴重な材料になるのです。

それに女性は特別扱いされるのが非常に好きな生き物なので、好きな人でも他の女性でも誰でもかれでも同じような扱いをしていると、女性は絶対に満足しません。

他の女性との差が欲しいと思っています。

だから、誰にでも優しくしてしまう男性は、女性にとっては不満がたまってしまうのです。

また、本当に愛情があるのか判断できないので恋愛が成就する確率が低くなってしまいます。

それだけ恋愛に関して、他の人との扱いの差をつけるということが大事なのです。

八方美人は恋愛面では役に立たず、残念な結果になってしまいがちです。

彼女にしたい女性がいるのであれば、その女性に特別感を感じさせてあげましょう。

 

言葉遣いが悪い

言葉遣いが悪い人は誰からも好かれないし、むしろ嫌われてしまいます。

特に初対面で女性に悪い言葉を使うと確実に嫌われます。

初対面でなくてもたまに言葉遣いが悪いだけでも「え?」となってしまいますよね。

神楽
「言葉遣いが悪いな、女性の扱い方も悪いのかも。」

と女性から思われてしまいますよ。

実際にそういう傾向もあるので、女性からすると判断がしやすいです。

たまに店員に横柄な態度をとるという男性もいますよね?

あれも言葉遣いが悪いと同じような部類に入ります。

男性からしてみると、女性の前でかっこつけてやろうとか、弱い立場の人間の上に立っている俺はかっこいいという自己満足かもしれませんよね。

それは女性から見てみると、絶対に彼氏にしたくない人の特徴にも挙げられるほどの嫌なタイプなんです。

弱い者いじめにしか見えないので、女性からは

言葉遣いが悪い男性への印象

「一緒にいて恥ずかしい」

「見損なった」

という厳しい意見が多いのです。

また、その時に

神楽
「自分の彼氏ではありません」

と言いたくなる女性も多いようですよ。

居ても立っても居られないので女性は止めに入りますが、なかなかやめてくれませんよね。

本当に店員にも言葉遣いの悪い男性は、基本的に女性は受け入れてくれません。

 

下ネタが多い

下ネタが好きでよく言葉に出して楽しんでいる男性はいませんか?

男性同士ならまだしも、女性に平気で下ネタを言って反応を楽しむ男性も中にはいますよね。

それは本当にやめましょう。

嫌がっているのになかなかやめてと言えない女性もいます。

女性にとって下ネタは下品というイメージが強いので、女性の前で言うことは絶対にやめておきましょう。

下ネタが好きな女性もいますが、そういう女性が相手ではない限りほとんどの女性が下ネタを言ってくる男性が嫌いなので、心に留めておくといいでしょう。

もしその女性と交際したいと思っているのなら、品のある男性を演出するためにも下ネタを言わない事です。

たまにお酒の席で、大人数で飲むこともあると思います。

そういう時に、誰かが下ネタを話題にするということが多いと思うんですが、そこであなたも下ネタに乗ってしまうと女性に引かれてしまいます。

周りの男性が下ネタを言っている中で、あなただけ乗らなかったらめちゃくちゃポイントが高いですよ!

下ネタを一切口にしない男性は、男性から見るとつまらない人に映るかもしれませんが、女性か見ると素敵な男性に映るのです。

 

全くアクションを起こさない

あなたは好きになった女性にちゃんとアプローチしていますか?

もしかして、アプローチをしていないのに彼女ができないと言っていませんか?

もしそうだとしたら、彼女が出来なくて当たり前です。

あなたからアプローチしないと彼女なんてできるわけがないのです。

女性の多くは、男性からアプローチしてほしいと思っています。

女性から告白したりなんて、積極性のある女性にしかできないことなんですよ。

しかしそんな女性も多くはないのが現状です。

もしかするとあなたの好きな女性は恋愛に奥手な女性かもしれません。

そういう女性の場合は、あなたがいくら待っていても女性から来てくれることはほぼ0と言って良いでしょう。

あなたからアクションを起こさなければ何も始まりません。

まずは、あなたから女性に対してアクションを起こしてあげましょう!

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周りに男性しかいない

周りに男性しかいないので、彼女ができないのも当然のことです。

では、彼女を作るためにはどうしたらいいのでしょうか?

それは、女性との出会いを増やすことです。

具体的には、マッチングアプリの活用がオススメです。

特に忙しい社会人の方にとっては、かなりオススメできます!

なぜなら、片手間で簡単に出来るからです。

菊池
実際私も合コンや街コンに参加する暇がないほど忙しいときはマッチングアプリを利用していました。

ただ、利用を考えている男性の中には

菊池
「本当に女性と出会えるの?」

と疑問を持つ方もいますが、安心してください。

マッチングアプリを正しく上手に活用すれば女性と出会えることはできます。

菊池
その証拠に23年間女性とデート経験がない私でも、数十名の女性とデートすることが出来ましたし、彼女も作ることが出来ました!

1ヶ月で13人と出会えたマッチングアプリの自己紹介文のテンプレート

2019.02.19

次にオススメなのは、合コンや街コン参加することです。

出会いを求めている女性が沢山いるので、比較的彼女ができやすい環境です。

私の知人も、彼女ができなくて悩んでいましたが、街コンに参加したことによって結婚相手を見つけることができたようです。

お遊びではなく、真剣に彼氏を探しに街コンに参加している女性は多いので、きちんと見極めて今後につなげることができる女性を見つけましょう。

【街コン初心者必見】街コンで付き合うまでの必勝法

2019.02.28

街コンで女性のLINEをゲットするための会話術

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街コンで出会えない原因を解説!

2019.02.13

次に、友達に女性を紹介してもらうという手もよくある話で、そこから彼女ができるパターンも多いです。

友達の女性なら、あなたに合った女性を紹介してくれるかもしれませんし、怪しい人ではないという安心感も出てくると思います。

しかし、自分の彼女になる人を友達から紹介されたくないというプライドのある方もいますよね。

その場合は、あなたの趣味のコミュニティに入ることをオススメします。

もし写真が趣味なら、写真が趣味な人が集まるコミュニティなどがあるはずです。

ネットでもメンバーを募集しているところがありますし、みずからネットを使って人を集めてみるのもいいと思います。

趣味がきっかけで彼女ができたという男性も多いので、彼女になってからも同じ趣味で楽しめることもできますよね!

 

自分の話だけしかしない

あなたは意識していないかもしれませんが、自分の話ばかりしていることはないですか?

思い返してみると、そういえば女性がどんな人なのかよくわかってないな。と思ったら危険信号です。

知らず知らずのうちに自分の話ばかりしているかもしれませんよ。

自分の話ばかりしていると、女性は退屈になってきて全く楽しくありません。

女性も自分のことを話したいと思っています。

なのにあなたばかり話していると、自分の事しか興味がなくて私の話はどうでもいいんだと感じてしまいます。

そうなると自然とあなたから遠ざかって行ってしまいますよね。

付き合っても自分の話ばかりしかしないということが分かるので、彼氏候補からは確実に外れることでしょう。

女性を満足させてあげるには、女性の話を最後まで満足するまで聞いてあげるということです。

女性もあなたに聞いてほしいから話をするのであって、少なくとも悪い印象はあなたに持ってないはずです。

だから一生懸命話をしています。

ある程度自分の話をしたら、女性に喋らせてあげる機会を作りましょう。

そして、女性の話を聞いているときは必ず相槌を打つことです。

女性はあなたの話を聞く姿勢や態度を見ています。

不快に感じられてしまっては、あなたとの今後の進展は望めないでしょう。

まずは女性に話をさせてあげる、女性が中心に話をできるようにしてあげるということを意識してあげると、まったく変わった変化が得られますよ。

 

理想が高い

あなたの理想の女性はどんな人でしょうか?

高すぎる女性の理想像
  1. 背が低くて
  2. 可愛くて
  3. 小動物みたいで
  4. 目が大きくて
  5. お人形さんみたいで
  6. ストレートヘアで
  7. 髪の毛が長くて

ではないでしょうか?

女性の理想像を持っていることは、とても素晴らしいことですが、彼女を作るとなれば話は違ってきます。

あなたの理想を全て兼ね備えている女性は少ないです。

もしいたとしても、あなたの事に全く興味のない人かもしれません。

必ずしもその人と出会えるというわけではないのです。

その為、あなたに彼女ができるということを遅らせてしまう原因となってしまいます。

理想の女性を追いかけることによって自らも磨きがかかるとは思いますが、かなり時間の無駄です。

理想の女性はいても、実際は理想とは真逆の女性と付き合っていたという男性はかなり多いです。

女性も同じことが言えて、理想があったのに好きになった人は理想とは真逆の人だったということが少なくないんです。

びっくりするかもしれませんが、それだけ人間の心はコロコロ変わるものです。

では理想が高い場合はどうするか?

私がオススメしているのは、自分が譲れないものを明確にするということです。

私の場合は

自分が譲れないものを明確にする例
  1. 自分のダメなところを受け入れてくれる
  2. 自分の趣味に理解を示してくれる(筋トレを続けていきたい)

みたいな感じです。

ポイントは容姿では絞らない事ですね。

容姿で絞ってしまうと女性の幅が一気に狭まってしまいます。

出会える母数を大きく保ちつつ、自分が譲れないものは何かを具体的にしましょう!

そのうえで、女性のタイプを付け足すという感じですね!

女性のタイプ
  1. 一緒に居て気を遣わない
  2. 一緒に居て落ち着く
  3. 笑いのツボが似ている
  4. 容姿端麗

などですね。

ここでも、細かすぎる容姿のタイプを付け足すことはやめましょう。

女性の幅を狭めてしまうだけで、もったいないからです。

女性への理想が高すぎる問題を解決するイメージとしては、自分が譲れないもの>女性のタイプです。

そうすることで、様々な女性と接することが出来るので、チャンスが広がりますし、今まで気づけなかった、恋愛観に出会えるかもしれませんよ!

女性と仲良くなっていくにつれて、理想には当てはまらないけど「好きかも」という気持ちになってくる場合が結構あるので、どんな人でも門前払いせずに仲良くなってみましょう。

理想が高すぎるのは、自ら彼女ができないようにしているとも言えますので注意しましょう!

 

細かい人

あなたはちょっとしたことに対してかなり敏感になっていませんか?

例えば、ちょっと女性と食事に出かけた際に割り勘だったとしますよね。

その時に一円単位まできっちり割り勘したりしていませんか?

割り勘は割り勘でも、女性は細かすぎる男性は嫌いな傾向があります。

一円単位とまでくると、女性は嫌気がさしてしまいますし、

神楽
「この人はケチなんだろうな」

という印象がついてしまいます。

付き合ってからもこんな細々したことに付き合っていかないといけないとなると、付き合う前から嫌になってしまいますよね。

他には、

女性から嫌われる細かい指摘

「箸の持ち方が違う」

「お皿の置き方が逆」

女性に対して細かい人もいます。

女性のことにまでケチをつけられ、細かいことを気にされると女性は本当に嫌になってしまいます。

細かいことにうるさい男性は大嫌いという女性は多いです。

細かい人は彼氏候補にもならないという女性がおおいので、自分の言動をよく思い出してみましょう。

女性に対しては特にですが、普段から人に細かいことを指摘したり、細かいことにこだわったりする傾向はありませんか?

良い言い方だと「几帳面」として捉えられますが、几帳面なところは時に彼女ができることを妨げてしまう原因にもなっています。

少し良い意味でルーズになることも必要なので、彼女を作ることにつなげたいのでしたら少しルーズになってみることが良いと思います。

細かい男性は非常に扱いづらいですし、心の狭い男性で、余裕がないと思われてしまいますからね。

もし何か指摘したくなってもグッと堪えましょう。

お金に関してもケチなのは彼女ができることの妨げになるので、彼女ができるかお金をケチるかどっちがいいか考えておきましょう。

もちろん彼女が欲しくて原因を調べていると思うので、彼女ができるまでの我慢と思って堪えましょうね。

 

まとめ

彼女ができない原因として、よくあるのが以上のポイントになります。

あなたに当てはまる項目はありましたか?

一個でも当てはまっていれば、彼女ができない原因がそれの可能性が高いので、今すぐ自分を見直す必要があります。

是非参考にしてみてください。

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